Friday, December 18, 2009 at 6:00PM Know someone who's been laid off? Practice the golden rule.
Advice to anyone who has a friend who's been laid-off: Three simple things you should practice--not just at Christmas--but all year long!
Today in the U.S. the effective unemployment rate is close to one in five people in the workforce--I'd be very surprised is this blog didn't apply to every reader!
First, however, let's get one thing straight right at the beginning: Being a great person in the world of business starts with being able to be a good friend to others. Yes, I know, the old saw, that cream and bastards rise to the top, but the way today we process both milk and select managers ain't done much any more the way either used to be. If you're not prepared to be a genuine, caring, feeling person when it's called for in your relationships with others, you aren't on any fast-track to anywhere worth going.
With that out of the way, let's talk about what you ought to do when someone you know has lost their job.
[1] Keep in touch--again, again, and again. Make sure to let them know you are thinking about them and that you care. The easiest way to do this is by phone--and that you'd call them at least once a week is, in my book, a given. Making it a point to actually see them in person if it's easy to do--this should not be out of the question and, really, is most idea!
The reason this kind of attention is that simple: your friend is feeling very much alone. They don't have a workplace to go to and be with others. They are having their own phone calls ignored, mostly by people who can't or don't want to offer them employment and who are avoiding them. You shouldn't be among this crowd. Make it a point to put "Call Bob" or "Call Sheila" on your to-do list at least once a week.
[2] Offer to be your friend's advocate whenever you naturally can. Always be alert to where in the marketplace others might be looking for just the person you know as a friend. Whenever you think there's a possibility that they might contribute to some organization or team, mention it; ask if you might recommend their contacting the right people for further discussion.
In terms of your friend, don't wait to be asked--offer to be a reference for them; invite being included on their resume as a person who can speak to their abilities and professional track-record. At a time your friend is feeling most friendless and professionally alone--that is the time for you to offer to be, where and whenever appropriate, their simple advocate.
[3] Take them to lunch--be a friend. We're talking about individuals here who feel the equivalent of having leprosy; yes, the analogy is perfect: they are business-world lepers...other people won't return their phone calls, people ignore their letters and eMails--believe me when I tell you that your friend has extended periods of time he or she feels like an "untouchable."
You can dispel some of the self-doubt and discouragement by simply being a normal, thoughtful friend. Hell, each of you are going to eat anyway, right? You could pay for it, but you don't have to. The dining out event need not be fancy--the important point is the talking and sharing and encouraging.
Just practice the Golden Rule.
These three step really come down to practicing the Golden Rule. Let's face it, the reason most of us are naturally inclined to ignore the plight of the unemployed is that we are afraid we won't know what to say in an awkward situation; or we feel uneasy that we are financially stable when our acquaintance isn't. That's your problem to deal with, not theirs!
I will be forever indebted to those individuals in my younger life who found--or made--the time... individuals who really had the empathy, imagination, and guts--to call me when I was in-between positions and looking for employment [and waiting and despairing]. Simply put, it's what friends do for each other!
Believe me, it doesn't cost much to do--but it's priceless to the person you're reaching out to! And...if you actually do this for someone--I promise you'll end up having a friend--an admirer--for the rest of your life.
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Reader Comments (2)
Great post, let's hope that 2010 brings less posts with titles that include "laid off" and more posts about hiring. Wish you the best this holiday season and a great start to 2010.
Nick
I had a dream to begin my commerce, however I didn't earn enough amount of cash to do that. Thank goodness my friend advised to take the mortgage loans. So I took the short term loan and made real my old dream.