Tuesday, November 17, 2009 at 4:00PM An open letter to a friend who just got laid-off.
Five things you must do now, after losing your job
Dear Dana,
I don’t know if you could tell it when we talked, but I was very saddened to learn of you’re having been laid-off last week. I could tell by the tone of your voice that you were shaken and somewhat at a loss for what to do. Because I’m further down the road of life than you are, I decided to send you this note with some heart-felt counsel I think you might find useful. Here are five steps I recommend you need to take today.
[1] Recognize that you have a new "job”—that would be to get another one! This new “job” assignment means that you must get up each day, ideally at your usual time, to start preparing for and then actually going out to find a new role that you will find rewarding. You will not be reporting formally or accountable to a supervisor like you used to—but, instead, your immediate “report” is to yourself.
[2] Immediately begin playing “defense” with your finances. First, file for unemployment. Then, even though you told me you received a sweet-deal severance package, act as if you didn’t and are in serious need of “fresh money." Keep whatever resources that you received from your previous employer as well as your personal or family savings as a “rainy-day” fund—and only use these resources when you really need to. A lot of people blow-through the severance benefits before they see the financial yellow light ahead—but you should be smarter than that.
Finally, aggressively cut all discretionary spending; pretend you are facing serious financial alternatives when you contemplate spending money for anything but must-have and must-be-done expenditures! When you eventually find new employment--and you will--there will still be restaurants to dine-out in, movies to attend, pedicures to get, vacations to take; with a little luck you’ll still have a savings account—better yet, even some or all of that severance package—left to do with exactly as you see fit. Spending it later is a lot more fun than idling it away when you shouldn’t.
[3] Make concrete plans to provide for yourself & your family first--even if it means getting a temporary paying job in an area other than what you are looking for on a more permanent basis. I know a lot of people who think that they must keep themselves professionally “pure” by not getting what amounts to a temporary job to provide for needed income. Frankly, I think that’s a crazy way to think about it, and I'll tell you why.
I’m far more sympathetic with someone who interviews with me who’s been active and resourceful during the in-between-job-times, compared to someone who’s simply sat around waiting for exactly the right position. I’m impressed by a person who has demonstrated the initiative to do what it takes to provide for themselves and their family, even if it meant taking a detour off his or her obvious career path for a while; this tells me that this person has the guts to do what it takes to get a problem solved or a task completed were they feasibly working on my team!
I assure you, your resume will speak volumes about what you’re capable of and interested in—far more than waiting at home watching TV and waiting for the perfect offer to come along! Football coach Pat Parcels puts it perfectly: "You are what your record says you are!"
[4] Strive to re-define what makes you happy. You’re on the verge of a stressful, trying period in your life. Your first inclination every time you turn around will be to feel guilty, sorry for yourself, ashamed for being let-go. You’re going to have to fight these feelings by engaging in some positive “self-talk”; you'll need to consciously remind yourself that you are still a good, worthy, valuable person—just not at to the last company that employed you!
Also, you need to make it a point to pay attention to how you spend your unstructured time: start reading good, entertaining books; pay more attention to your existing hobbies; catch-up and accomplish things around the house you’ve intended to do for a long time. Managing your "free" time is very critical to helping you keep your "head" in the game!
[5] Consciously focus on and then nurture your outlook about yourself, life, and those around you. Now is a perfect time to re-invent yourself. Seriously consider whether you’ve been handed an opportunity to change fields, make a career move, start a business you’ve flirted with for a long time. Ever thought of moving to a better place for you or your career? The circumstances you are in might very easily be the perfect chance to consciously open the door to a new and better future; strive to shape the circumstance you didn’t choose to work to your own long-term advantage, benefit and contentment.
Whatever you decide along these lines, there are some things you need to actively do. First, have regular “team” meetings at home with the family and those you are close to; talk openly about both the collective fears and hopes that any of us would reasonably have, but in the end, alway favor a conscious bias to focus to making plans that are redemptive and positive.
Second, network with others outside of your family and close friends as much as you can. This means getting in touch with old business acquaintances to let them know of what you’re now “in the market” for, maybe asking them if they’d be willing to be a reference for you. If you can, also network—and then actually meet--with others who are also on the job hunt; with them share tips, contacts, success stories, frustrations. By doing this you will be doing yourself a great favor—and likely the others you touch as well at the same time!
That’s all for now. I’d write more on secrets on how to “market yourself” most effectively, but I’ll save that for another letter. For now, rest assured that you have my unqualified regard and respect. I’ll do anything I can to help you out of this temporary predicament. Let’s talk by phone soon--call me first if you are inclined. With affection—Keith.
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